When I was nearing the end of my pregnancy with Dallin and so anxious to have him, people would say, "They're SOO much easier in than out." Which is definitely true, but I wouldn't trade having Dallin with being pregnant with him for the past 2 years!
And it's the same with this pregnancy- people feel compelled to tell me how hard it's going to be when the baby comes. Conversations go something like this:
Them: "When is your baby due?"
Me: "April 2."
Them: "Is it your first?"
Me: "No, it's my second."
Them: "Ohhh, 2 is SO MUCH harder than 1! Is it a boy or a girl?"
Me: "It's a girl! We're really excited to have one of each."
Them: "Ohhh, girls are SO MUCH harder than boys!"
Luckily, not everyone responds that way. And I realize that I have to take comments and advice from people with a grain of salt- people aren't always tactful, but don't always intend to be mean or hurt my feelings. But I'm having this baby in less than 2 days, and I'm worried enough as it is! I need some positive reinforcement now, not negativity! Surely having 2 kids, or a girl, is not the end of the world, otherwise NO ONE would ever do it! So my question is, does ANYONE out there have a GOOD story about having two kids? Anybody LOVE having a daughter? Please share!!
And he's off - Ugh
4 months ago
10 comments:
You should talk to Emily Burr. She always talks about transitioning from 1 to 2 & how much easier it was than she though ... or than going from 0 -1. Anyway, I KNOW you will be fine. People always tell me that boys are harder than girls - it probably just depends on who you talk to & what stage of life they are talking about. Every child goes through a hard stage (or a few of them for that matter) whether they are the oldest, youngest, girl or boy. You will do great, Jake will be a big help & so will Dallin! Good luck in the next few days!
Hi, Amber! Remember me? The Neslens - we were in your ward a couple of years ago!
I had twins first so I can't really say about transitioning to two kids. But our third was a girl. I was so worried because I needed to get new girl things, and figure out how to do her hair (NOT my specialty) and I was worried about having three kids to tote around.
So, my daughter ended up being the EASIEST baby ever, and added such a sweetness to the family, that I can't even remember what it was like to NOT have her in the family. And for it's worth, 3 was trickier than two, but it didn't take a life change to make things work smoothly. Just put everybody in the tub together for a couple of years! =) And - she didn't have hair for two years, so I didn't even have to worry about that for a while!
The bottom line is, Heavenly Father knows what we can handle, and somehow it just happens like it's supposed to! Your kids won't be anything like other people's kids, and you'll have the sweetest, smartest kids of all (just like we all do!) You'll love having two who interact with each other, and you'll love having a cute little girl, who does everything totally differently than your little boy. Isn't motherhood great?
Sorry for the long post. Just can't resist on this topic! =)
You are going to do fine!!! Two is a piece of cake - no worries. You've got an awesome husband, Dallin will seriously be a huge help (go get the binky, the wipes, the washcloth, the lotion, carry the diaper bag, etc.). Dallin is going to be your #1 helper.
I've never doubted you for a second. Sending positive thoughts your way!
This is right up my alley! You'll be fine. Boys and girls are not any harder or easier--just different and it's the experience you sign up for when you have kids. If it's hard--you'll be fine--if it's a breeze, you'll be the positive voice for those that have yet to go through it. Best of luck!
It's true! For me - 2 was much easier than 1. I was a little nervous when I was pregnant with Macy because I felt like I knew "boy", now I had to learn "girl". I realize now that I know so little about either one of them. :) I just have to take it moment to moment.
You'll be great! I don't know why people say such annoying things. Someone actually told me that my labor and delivery must have been "easy" because they were only 5 pounds. Hello! We are also the only ones in Greg's family to have a boy first (the other 5 siblings all had a girl first). They all doomed me with how awful it would be to have a boy first because they aren't responsible and can't babysit. That's just ridiculous!
I did feel a different kind of connection with Macy than I did with Austin right after she was born. I held her and realized that I understood a lot of the things she would go through in life because we are both women. I felt much more of a need to protect. I don't know. That probably doesn't make any sense.
I said it before - just try to enjoy the first few months, and don't worry too much about housework, cooking, church stuff, etc. That will all work itself out. Good luck (and call if you need help)!
Oh yeah - I forgot to mention that I LOVE having a girl! :) You might have to give me the same kind of advice when I am nervous about having a boy. So far I am excited, but come July 25th I might have a few anxieties. Today is day ZERO! Yay!
Amber - you will do great. I'm sure there will be days that you'll feel overwhelmed, but they'll be far outweighed by the wonderful days. As for having two - Katie absolutely adores Anthony, she idolizes him. If he's in the room - she's good; if he's staying at grandma's or something she's a terror. Dallin will be great with a little girl, loving and protective. And for me, so far, having a girl hasn't been all that different from having a boy. Of course, she's only a year old, but still.
You can sooooo do this!
Christy
By the way...I do LOVE my daughters. I think any child, regardless of gender, brings their strengths and challenges to a family.
Girls are the best! (besides cute boys of course :-) I'll admit with girls you have drama, but we have 25+ years of dealing with that, so we're pros. ;-) I love having a girl because Sarah is so helpfull and even though she learned at a young age how to turn on the tears, I know that's normal and at times even cute. From what I've heard your get energy with boys and drama with girls, and I'm ok with that. Every kid is different and that's what makes it fun. We don't call her princess for nothing. I'm so glad you had a girl.
Of course two kids are going to be a bit more of a challenge, but you get used to it quickly just like you did when you became a parent for the first time.
BTW, in case I didn't emphasis enough about girls, here it goes:
- I love how "girly" Sarah is with her princess stuff and playing house.
- Mike loves having a "daddy's little girl," and they share a bond different than ours.
- Sarah is just as energetic as a boy (I think) and loves to play outside.
- She is a big help with Steven, even if it's only making cute sounds to him.
- She is the master of tantrums, but sometimes it's cute.
I really love having a girl, it's these boys that make me nervous. :-)
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