This post is not for the weak-stomached or faint-hearted. If you have a heart condition, recently had surgery, or are just plain afraid of poop, please stop reading now! You've been warned!
It all started at Wal-mart today, where I spend a surprising amount of time and money. I started having some very strong gas pains (which I'll blame on the pregnancy). I kept shopping, hoping they'd go away before I left the store. Then, all of a sudden, they were no longer gas pains. I realized, this was not a drill, this was an emergency! And there I stood, in the milk section, with Dallin and perishable foods in the cart. I hasitly started shoving the milk, yogurt, sour cream, etc back on the shelves, not wanting them to spoil because I didn't know how long I'd be. I was literally jogging to the restrooms at the front of the store, when OF COURSE I ran into someone I know. She said hi and was slowing down to talk to me. I didn't even pause, just yelled over my shoulder, "we're on our way to an emergency bathroom trip!" hoping she'd assume it was Dallin who needed the restroom, not me! When I got up to the front, luckily without any "accidents" from all the running, OF COURSE the bathrooms were being cleaned! The sign said go to the restrooms in the back. Back restrooms? My mind was shutting down with panic. Back restrooms? I jogged BACK to where I'd started, and OF COURSE those restrooms were about 10 feet from where I'd been shopping! I made it just in time, then spent who knows how long with Dallin in the stall with me, asking for cookies, to leave, string cheese, to leave, chocolate milk, to leave. As if being sick in a public restroom wasn't torture enough! Again, I'm just grateful there were no "accidents" in that public place. Thank you, pregnancy. Have any of you had an experience like this?
And he's off - Ugh
4 months ago
8 comments:
I'm so sorry, but I'm glad you made it to the bathroom. Bathroom issues are one thing that nobody tells you about before you have children, but you become quite versed on afterward.
hen I was twelve, my mom had my youngest sister, so this memory is quite vivid. I also feel comfortable sharing it because it's one of my mother's favorites to tell.
Anyway...She was coming home from a church event (she was wearing a green dress that my aunt loving saved and, in all seriousness, tried to hand it down to me when I was pregnant 15 years later with Austin). Anyway, she was trying to run into the house when she stopped in the garage and started laughing. She had wet her pants in the garage. My dad hosed her down (seriously!).
Last year, when I was pregnant with Paige, Greg and I went to a basketball game with his dad who had just had surgery for prostate cancer. On the way to the game, Greg and I were in the car alone when I sneezed and announced that I had just wet my pants. While we were at the game, his dad sneezed and announced that he had just wet his pants. Poor Greg was surrounded by incontinence!
If it makes you feel any better, I have thrown several items of clothing away in the Walmart bathroom due to puke and diarrhea from my kids (onsies, underwear for potty training toddlers, pants, socks, etc.) Two weeks ago, Austin threw up in the toothpaste section and I had to buy him a sweatshirt to wear home. Thank goodness Walmart sells everything!
Emily, thank you so much for your comment! I laughed so hard I ALMOST peed my pants (another pregnancy problem)! I just don't think Jake understands the way other moms do!
Those are scary, frantic moments - and it can happen to anyone, pregnant or not. Hope you're feeling better!
Too bad you didn't keep some of the milk with you - Dallin could have had his snack!
Oh my gosh....I am laughing so hard right now. Only you would post that! :) I haven't ever had any experiences like that...but I have peed the bed recently... hahaha. What's wrong with me?
Well I'm not going to write a novel like Emily here- bye!
I know...I am so longwinded!
Um, yeah...I totally feel your pain. For some reason, (I'm being really candid here) Walmart does that to me everytime! I swear. It's awful when I have my kids with me, and a cart full of groceries. What can you do? Glad I'm not alone.
I haven't ever had that experience in Wal.mart, but my stomach gives me a hard time in life & I know exactly the situation you were in. No fun. I do find it strange that if I spend a long time shopping that I always end up in the bathroom somehow. Does your Wal.Mart have the litte seats bolted to the wall for little kids? Polly loves those...and yes, we have probably spent too much time back there for her to get excited when we walk into the stall. :)
Yes, I too have had an emergency like that, luckily it wasn't in public. I was doing this lemon diet thing. It consists of drinking a laxative tea at night and a quart of water in the morning. For about 2 hours after drinking the water, I couldn't leave past a 10 foot radius of the bathroom.
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